First Short Film tips, ideas and criticism

Hey guys!!

I haven't been around for a long time due to school, work and some family issues. Anyway this is a project I made for my film production class, and I hope some of you guys will watch it and give me some ideas, comments and feedback. The entire project was made with Hitfilm 2.

Thanks!

Comments

  • StormyKnight
    StormyKnight Moderator, Website User, Ambassador, Imerge Beta Tester, HitFilm Beta Tester Posts: 2,729 Ambassador
    edited December 2014

    I laughed. I cried. I almost spit out my coffee!

    Okay, the only thing I would recommend is crossfade the music or fade out a section rather than an abrupt stop- except when it's warranted. The music breaks that occured disrupted the overall flow but not to the point where it was unenjoyable- more of a distraction.

    I like how you managed to pull off emotions coming from a pen and the switch to black and white after the........the........the horrible incident was ingenious. That really gave a nice stark contrast for the feeling of loss.

    I actually yelled "Oh NO!!!!!" when the pencil was headed for the sharpener.

    Thanks for brightening up a rather dull evening and hope to see you around more often. How's your back?

  • KahvehRobinett
    KahvehRobinett Website User Posts: 443

    YES! So happy you enjoyed it! 

    And yes I do realize some of the music is abrupt or has and awkward introduction. I should probably go back and change some of it or smooth it out.

    Interestingly enough I had a little issue with my teachers over the "violence" in the ending. Some people were getting pretty upset. . meh . . . like I care haha

    And wow I'm suprised you remembered. My back is ok, still painful at times though. Thanks for asking Stormy. 

  • StormyKnight
    StormyKnight Moderator, Website User, Ambassador, Imerge Beta Tester, HitFilm Beta Tester Posts: 2,729 Ambassador
    edited December 2014

    I don't typically laugh at violence* but this was so over the top it cracked me up. Funny how the guy stood upright for so long.

    Well I hoped the prognosis on your back is the pain will eventually go away. Did you go through any therapy?

    *An exception would be when Indy shot the sword weilding bad guy in Raiders.

  • KahvehRobinett
    KahvehRobinett Website User Posts: 443

    Yeah the entire short was supposed to be super "over the top." It just made me a little mad at how upset some people got over it. 

    And no. I did therapy, and they said ill be looking at having pain forever. Im fine though, im still very physically active and stuff. 

  • Triem23
    Triem23 Moderator Moderator, Website User, Ambassador, Imerge Beta Tester, HitFilm Beta Tester Posts: 19,418 Ambassador

    Yeah, I'm with Stormy. I laughed, I cried (Ok, I didn't cry, but I did laugh a lot).

    Wait, wait, wait, your teachers and classmates had an issue with the ending? What the hell, man? That's a perfect ending, and funny! It's fairly obvious you took that sequence over the top on purpose!

    We can merely assume that your teacher and classmates shall NOT be seeing "Hobbit: The Battle of OMFG, HOW LONG IS THIS BATTLE GOING TO BE?!" since, you know, that's going to be much more violent than your film!

    I am reminded of one of my college projects--it was a parody of "America's Most Wanted," and one of the segments was on a serial killer of stuffed animals. I spent about a hundred bucks on stuffed animals and spent a fun afternoon filming the "dramatic re-enactment" murder segments. I picked up a lot of beanie babies because, when sawing back and forth through them with the 14 inch kitchen knife the little beads were spurting out and dropping--it was like violent "bleeding!" (The best bit was when the actor playing my killer asked if he could "peel" and "eat" the "Bananna in Pajamas," which was absolutely hysterical.) Some people in that class actually found that montage disturbing because it really was a violent orgy of stuffed toy destruction.

  • KahvehRobinett
    KahvehRobinett Website User Posts: 443

    Glad to hear you enjoyed it Triem.

    Haha that college short of yours sounds pretty rad.

  • Triem23
    Triem23 Moderator Moderator, Website User, Ambassador, Imerge Beta Tester, HitFilm Beta Tester Posts: 19,418 Ambassador

    It had it's moments. It was for a multicam production class, so the dramatic re-enactment footage was B-stocl for inserts. We're talking late 90's,so we had ugly Chyron in-studio, and half the crew left mid-tapimg. I was calling cameras while running the teleprompter AND audio. And cam2 operater left between camera rehearsal and taping! I got an A, rest of crew got a C. 

    I find it odd youcall this your first film, since you have shown so many other projects! Great little short, though. So cute and touching!  

     

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